Save jokes for minor, short-term illnesses. For anything serious, stick to warm and sincere messages instead.
How to write it
- Only use humour for minor or short-term illnesses.
- Joke about the office, not the illness.
- End with a genuine wish to get better.
Office humour
Get well soon! The office has been dangerously productive without you.
Hurry back — we need someone to blame for the missing stapler.
Get well soon. Your desk misses you. So does your inbox, aggressively.
We’ve held three meetings without you. Nothing was decided. Please return.
Get well soon! Nobody else laughs at my jokes.
Rest-and-recovery jokes
Enjoy your break from Zoom. Get well soon!
Rest up — Netflix won’t watch itself.
Doctor’s orders: stay in bed and ignore Slack. We approve.
Get well soon! Your sofa has been waiting for this moment.
Being ill is the only acceptable reason to miss the all-hands. Well played.
For an injury
Sorry about the leg! At least you have a good excuse to skip the stairs now.
Get well soon! Next time, let the furniture win.
Your cast is the most interesting thing in the office. Hurry back so we can sign it.
Heal fast! The office football team is suspiciously relieved.
One-liners
Get well soon — or else!
Germs: 1, You: soon to be 1.
Sick of being sick yet?
Feel better, slacker!
Come back, we’re bored.
What to avoid
- Humour for serious, chronic, or mental health conditions.
Organising the whole card? Our get well card guide covers timing and who to invite. For more ideas, read Get Well Soon Messages for a Coworker.